Why does sexual incompatibility occur?
Last reviewed: 17.10.2021
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Sexual incompatibility is the second most common cause of disintegration. In the first place - full emotional incompatibility. Why there is sexual misunderstanding and what to do about it?
What is sexual incompatibility?
Scientists are still arguing about whether there is actually sexual incompatibility or is simply the result of illiteracy in a sexual and emotional way. The true sexual incompatibility of doctors consider obvious deviations from the norm, for example, impotence or frigidity, which can occur only in 2% of cases.
Experts in the field of sexology believe that in its pure form, biological incompatibility is extremely rare between the pair. In 80% of cases, its cause is contrived and it can (not say, which is easy) but eliminated. It's enough just to become more enlightened in the field of sexual relations. There are a lot of ways: special literature, communication with a doctor-sex therapist, Internet sources.
Causes of biological incompatibility
According to the pair, it can be:
- Different temperaments
- Different day mode
- Different concept of sex
- Different biorhythms
These reasons in most cases are not under the soil, according to many sexologists. From the very beginning, these conflicts could be brought to naught if a man and woman knew more about themselves in a sexual way (not to mention the partners). But in practice it often happens that the artificial biological incompatibility is inflated to incredible proportions, and then it is necessary to correct the relations that have heated up because of insults, insults and mutual distrust. The investigation becomes a greater obstacle in the relationship than the cause.
Therefore, the sooner a couple receives a sexologist's consultation, the faster they can establish their relationships - both sexual and psychological. The couple should come to the reception together, individual consultations are also possible. The best help for a sexologist is with combined techniques, when individual sessions alternate with paired ones.
[1], [2], [3], [4], [5], [6], [7], [8], [9], [10]
When sexual intercourse brings pleasure
Sexual instinct is one of the strongest in the wild. But only a person spends sexual intercourse not only because of the continuation of the family, but because of the pleasure. Low sexual culture can be an obstacle to getting pleasure in sexual intercourse. For example, a couple (or one of a couple) may think that pleasure in sex can get him and without any feelings to the partner. But this is far from the case. If there is no feeling, the sexual intercourse turns into coitus (copulation). Such an act with a purely biological content is much less likely to be successful than proximity, in which both experience reciprocity.
But is enough for a full-fledged sexual intercourse only love (sympathy for each other)? Of course no. The couple should have at least a minimum of knowledge about sexual relations.
Sexuality of a man
A man usually has a stronger sexual temperament than a woman. So it is inherent in nature - it is more quickly excited and more active in the intima. The initiative for sexual relations usually comes from a man (biologically, he justifies his role as a male).
If a man follows only his instincts, but is illiterate in a sexual way, normal relations can fail. If a man only takes the initiative, strongly demanding sex, is quickly excited and does not know how to control his erection, he needs either an experienced patient partner, or an experienced sexologist who will correct his sexual behavior.
Aggressive sexual act, in which a man takes into account only his emotions and does not take into account the feelings of the partner, requires both great physical and emotional stress. In this love game is almost absent, the sexual act is fast and aggressive, and orgasmic sensations can occur only in men, but they last for long. With a full sexual intercourse, a love game can last from 10 to 15 minutes, then coitus comes (coitus), the orgasmic phase of both can last longer and the pleasure slowness is slow, the pleasure is stretched in time.
Conflict of interest in case of incorrect sexual intercourse
With aggressive sexual intercourse without the desire of a woman, she can not experience orgasm in general. During the act itself, a woman can remain cold and indifferent, at the end not having experienced any pleasure. And then there may be a conflict of interests: a man who is ill-mannered sexually does not understand what is going on, because he tried so hard. He has suspicions of his partner, he makes claims to her coldness, thinking that she is enjoying herself with someone else. Experienced sexologist will help to solve this problem, you need only the desire of both.
With properly conducted sexual intercourse, a man must learn to control his emotions and biological instincts. It is desirable that his orgasm in time coincided with the partner's orgasm. That is, a man must learn to restrain his excitement, be able to stimulate a partner, doing this so that by the end of the sexual act the excitement of both has reached the same intensity. Then there is no question of sexual incompatibility.