Preparing a man for the birth of a child

, medical expert
Last reviewed: 19.10.2021

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Spouses may be happy that they need to prepare for the birth of a child. Quite soon the waiting will end, and they will start a new family life.

For weeks of waiting there is a desire to do a lot of things, for example, color a child's room, buy a crib, buy a new seat for the car (this is the most important and we strongly recommend this purchase). It is quite interesting to take care of this together, although we recommend that the future mother avoid freshly painted walls and furniture.

Spouses may also have other concerns, such as attending childbirth education courses and practicing new knowledge at home. If a man wants to help his wife during childbirth, there is a need for additional training. This is discussed in more detail in Chapter 10. Concerns that should not be postponed until later are the choice of the pediatrician and the search for a nanny. Spouses should think about this together. Why now? To be ready!

It is better if the spouse chooses a pediatrician before the birth of the child, so that the doctor can perform an examination in the hospital. It would be nice to talk with a doctor before the woman gives birth, when the man is more emotionally stable than in the hospital. And this meeting in advance will allow spouses to find someone else if the couple seems that they can not agree with this doctor.

Finding out whether there are organizations providing care for the child in the area of residence of spouses is a good idea, especially in the case of a newborn. Spouses may already imagine how much they will pay for babysitting or nurseries, but do they know if they are actually available? In some cases, the couple will have to enroll in the queue. A good babysitter or nursery for a child under 3 years is difficult to find, because at this age children require much more time and effort than older siblings. Spouses may find that in their area these services are not too widespread and should be queued as soon as possible.

All this is a very important part of preparing for the birth of a child. If you are ready in advance, you can relax, knowing that you have already taken care of some important things.

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Choosing a doctor for a child

If possible, the pediatrician who will observe the child should be selected before his birth so that the spouses can talk to this doctor and visit his office before they are identified with the choice of the doctor who will arrange them. You should see your doctor 3 or 4 weeks before the expected date of birth, in case the baby is born earlier. Topics of conversation can be such: observation in the hospital, whether the woman intends to breastfeed and if the son is born. Whether to circumcise him.

There are several types of doctors who can provide care for a child. These are pediatricians, family doctors and district doctors. A family doctor or a local doctor may be the only one available in some cases.

To make a choice, you first need to ask friends what doctors they like and how they trust. About them you can ask and obstetrician-gynecologist, watching a woman. If these sources do not contain names, you should contact the health center. It is necessary to check the insurance - is there a list of doctors to whom the insured is obliged to apply.

When the couple chose a pediatrician, you need to meet with him. To the person with whom conversation is conducted, it is necessary to inform, that spouses search for the pediatrist for their child who will be born soon. Some doctors prefer personal meetings, others organize seminars for several couples. You should ask if there is an entry for these meetings. Such activities can be both paid and free. Below is a list of questions that should be asked the doctor. They are followed by a list of what to think about after the meeting.


Questions to Ask

Below is a list of questions that the spouses may wish to think about, and then ask their doctor to start a dialogue about caring for the child.

  • What is your qualification and practice?
  • How much are you available?
  • Is it possible to agree on the reception hours in accordance with our schedule?
  • Do you take the weekend?
  • Is there someone in the clinic who we can call if we only need medical advice?
  • Is it possible to examine a sick child on the same day?
  • How can you be found in case of emergency or after the end of the day?
  • Who will intervene in case of your absence?
  • Do you have a website or e-mail?
  • Do you or your assistant answer phone calls the day they were made?
  • Is there an X-ray and a laboratory in this clinic?
  • Are you interested in preventive measures, development and behavior of the child?
  • How exactly is your practice?
  • Is this paid for by our insurance?
  • Do you have a person who will check our insurance for us?
  • What is the emergency center nearest to our home that we can turn to?
  • What happens in the event of a special medical situation? Who do you contact?

What else to look for when choosing a pediatrician

There are some things that the couple can not discuss until they analyze their feelings after talking with the doctor. Below is a list of questions to be considered together after the meeting.

  • Is the doctor's attitude to such things as antibiotics and other medicines, child care, or religious beliefs relevant to medicine appropriate?
  • Is the doctor interested in the same things as the spouses?
  • Will this doctor be available as often as they need?
  • Was this doctor interested in establishing contact with their future child?
  • Did this doctor show interest in establishing contact with spouses?
  • Is this the person with whom the spouse feels comfortable and with whom the child will feel comfortable?
  • Did this doctor listen to the spouses?
  • Did he take their care seriously?
  • Is the age, practice, diploma (or lack thereof), sex, accessibility, marital status, or other facts associated with the doctor important to spouses?

Choice of children's institution

Choosing a children's institution or nanny can be a very difficult job, the couple need to make a lot of decisions in this process. The best way to do this is to understand what the spouses need before they start choosing.

But to choose - this is only part of the case, you should know that good nannies and children's institutions are in great demand, and they are difficult to find. Experts advise parents to start searching at least 6 months before they need these services. In some cases, this may be the end of the second trimester of pregnancy! If the spouses manage to find a nursery, organization or nanny who arrange them, they should register as soon as possible, because there is likely a queue. If you later find something more suitable, you can always change your mind.

Before the spouses are determined with what they want, they should decide what they need and their child. In particular, there may be the following options:

  • home care provided by a family member or employee
  • nursing home at the nanny
  • nursery or other children's institution

Home care

Spouses can decide that the child will stay at their home, and care for him will provide a relative or an employee.

If someone comes home to care for a child, it's good. It will not be necessary to prepare the child for an exit in the mornings and you will not need to take it anywhere in bad weather. This will also save time.

If the care of the child is provided by the employee, this can be very expensive, since he will come to the couple's home. In this case, a new person comes to the house, and you should ask for recommendations and read them carefully.

Nursing home care

Spouses can decide what kind of child will be taken care of at home from someone else, since the home environment causes less stress.

However, such organizations are often non-governmental and not even officially registered, therefore, the situation should be checked very carefully.

Perhaps, in this case, you have to pay taxes for an employee, as well as pay insurance for him. Spouses should make sure that their property is insured and that the insurance covers these costs.


A nursery is an organization where a lot of children are in a large room and where they are taken care of. Crèches vary greatly in the quality of care and attention given to each particular child. Some nurseries do not accept newborn babies. Babies have certain needs, and parents should make sure that they are provided in the manger.

Necessary things

Perhaps the couple will be amazed at the abundance of children's things that they will find when they buy them for their future child. There is no need to buy the whole range; should be selective and choose what is really needed, and what the more experienced people recommended (the cradle is a good example, most future parents think that they do not need it, but if they have a particularly capricious baby, it will be a gift from above !).

You should think about what the child will need, make a list and make purchases, focusing on it! Perhaps the spouses will want to buy all the pretty things they will see, but this can be a waste of money. And it should be remembered that they will receive many gifts for the child, which will prove useful and save money.

If you are careful and prudent, you can save a fairly large amount, which will be needed at the arena, equipping with a changing table and much more. Therefore, spouses should choose time and look around - this can justify the time and effort.

There are many ways to find the best ratio of the price and quality of children's things. You should compare prices in different stores, for example, in a discount store, a specialized store, a shop "Everything for the Home" and in the second hand. Read consumer magazines and search the Internet.

It's time to check the balance of accounts intended for these purchases. The saved amount can set some cost limits.

We want to give the couple some advice. Impulsive decisions should be avoided. There are not enough reasons for buying a thing, like the fact that the couple saw the thing and they liked it. Learn from other parents what things were useful to them, and decide whether such things will be useful to you.

Spouses can be amazed at how much they can save by buying things at the least expensive store. If you have a computer, you can compare it to the prices on the Internet. Maybe. The spouses will want to test the subjects in the matter - whether they are convenient and easy to use. For example, if the spouses are thinking of purchasing a backpack or kangaroo, their models and volumes of women can affect the usability of these items.

Should I borrow money?

Spouses can save some money if they borrow some of the children's clothes and other necessary things from friends or relatives. Proved fact - children do not wear things that they have not grown to. If the couple can borrow a baby cot or use a stroller slightly, this will greatly help their budget.

If spouses take things on loan, they should remember about "etiquette". Spouses will show themselves on the good side, and the one from whom they take things will appreciate it. Remember the following manifestations of good manners.

The things should be well looked after and kept clean and in good condition.

It should be found out if he wants the one whose spouses lend the goods, get them back and when.

Do not lose track of things. You can make a list of which of the items someone lent, and store it in a safe place, using it to remember what to return.

You can write a thank-you letter to a person so people know that their spouses appreciated their kindness.

You can do to someone whose spouses have borrowed something, something nice, for example, offer him something or bake a plate of "branded" pies.

What things will the couple need?

Baby for the newborn can be anything: a separate room, niche in the wall or part of the bedroom.

BABY CLOTHES. The child will need clothes, but her choice should be practical. Most children require only some basic models of clothing for the first year of life. Many pretty suits look very good, but you should not spend money on them if they are not needed (perhaps the couple will receive a lot of different clothes for the child as a present).

The child will not need as many clothes as the spouses want to buy. Diapers, t-shirts, clothes with a fastener on the back, slippers, socks, sliders, a hat, warm outerwear, a shirt, blankets and towels, and the baby can sleep in almost anything - in a cradle, in a stroller or in an arena.

The most important items that the spouses will need when they bring the child home are what he will sleep in, and what he will be wrapped and clothed with. If the children's room is not ready by the time the child is born, even a basket for a short period of time will come down.

Other necessary items: a comfortable seat (for example, a children's chair), a drawer with a drawer (if it can be replaced with a changing table, this will save money), diapers, a baby monitoring device, a small lamp, mobile table, evaporator or humidifier and detector smoke.

Spouses can decide to buy unassembled furniture. Usually it is cheaper and it can be assembled so that it comes to the room. When it comes to decorating a room, one should be creative. In order to make the room more fun, you can use a decorative canopy for the bed and paint. One painted or wallpapered wall will give the room a joyous look. Spouses do not have to spend a lot of money.

MANEZHI and CHILDREN'S BEDS. Many parents want the child to sleep in a cot for a while in their room, others from the first day of their home place him in a playpen in the nursery. A cot is a small folding bed for a child in which he can sleep until he grows out of it. The mattress of this bed should approach it tightly, and the sheets should not slide. There is a fairly large number of models of baby cots, and it can be difficult to find a suitable one.

Manezh is a thing for a longer period; some of them can be increased with the growth of a child, and it can even be rebuilt into a bed. Before making this purchase, you should find out whether each particular model matches the safety certificate.

For the arena you will need suitable sheets. Some scientists believe that in the arena there should be no objects, except for the sheet and the child - no cushions, pillows or blankets to reduce the risk of SDS (sudden infant death syndrome).

There are two types of diapers - disposable and reusable, made from fabric. If the spouses decide to buy reusable diapers from the fabric, they can be washed independently. Perhaps the couple will decide to purchase both of these diapers: they have their dignity in different situations.

In addition to clothing, the child will need some more things. Comb and comb, nail scissors, nasal lavatory siphon, ear or rectal thermometer, baby shampoo, diaper ointment, baby oil, baby powder, diapers, cotton buds and petroleum jelly should be at hand when needed.

BAG FOR FILLS AND NECESSARY OBJECTS. Parents will quickly realize that a diaper bag is necessary in some situations. When the family leaves the house, it is possible to put diapers, diapers, extra clothes, a bottle or baby food, nipples, toys, blankets and other necessary things.

You can save money if you do not buy an expensive bag. We told many young fathers and mothers that a regular backpack is the best model of such a bag! Do they look better? The backpack can be worn on the back, not in the hand. This gives more freedom and allows the child to pay more attention.

SEAT FOR THE MACHINE. The most important piece of equipment that you need to buy is a car seat. We recommend buying a new seat for the car so that parents can be sure that the child is securely protected during his first trip from the hospital to his home. The child must be in the seat whenever he is in the car - this is the law. The safest place is the middle of the rear seat of the car.

Does the child really need a car seat? Yes! This is the best protection for the child in the event of an accident. The child should be placed there during each trip!

When choosing a seat for a child, you should be sure that it meets safety standards. After buying a seat, but before you need to pick up a child from the hospital, it is necessary that the correct installation of the seat checked by someone who knows, such as a policeman. He can give instructions on installation.

Seats can be designed for children of different weights, and a combined type is also possible, when the seat is taken out of the car and converted into a stroller.

If the spouses live in the city and they do not have a car, do they need to buy a car seat? The answer is, of course, yes. Even if the child goes by taxi, he should be in the seat. A suitable choice for parents in this situation is a portable "travel system". In fact, these are three items in one - a car seat, a baby carrying device and a stroller. It can be used until the child overgrows it. And this is convenient when one thing can perform several functions.

Preparing a home for the appearance of a child

In this section, we provide some guidance on how to make a home safe for a new child. This will also make the house safer for the spouses.

Children should live in a smokeless environment. Therefore, after the birth of a child, you can not smoke in the house. If a man needs it, he should do it out of the house. Also, you should not smoke in the car. Whenever a child (or his mother, for that matter) inhales smoke, this is bad for health. Bronchitis, asthma and other respiratory diseases most often occur in children, at least one of whose parents smokes.

As we said earlier in this chapter, you should check the paint on the walls of the house and make sure that all painted surfaces are in good condition. If a man repaints something, you should find out if the paint contains lead. You can do this yourself using tests that are sold in hardware stores.

If the house has water damage, for example, leaking roof, foundation or pipes. A man it is desirable to do this before the child appears at home. If such leaks are ignored, then mold appears, which can cause a bleeding from the lungs in a newborn. It is believed that this disease causes poisonous mold, growing on a wet tree and paper. When the mold dries, its spores fall into the air. If they are inhaled by a newborn, the mold will grow in its lungs; This is mainly true for children younger than a half-naked. Therefore, dry the wet areas as soon as possible. You should discard all wet objects, if they have not dried in 24 hours, replace the darkened wooden panels. Wash walls and wooden objects with a mixture consisting of 1 part hydrogen peroxide and 4 parts water, and see if new leaks appear.

If there is a well near the house and the water in it has not been checked, it should be checked before the birth of the child for the presence of nitrates. If a child drinks baby food (in the case of breastfeeding it is safe, even if the mother drinks this water) and it is made on water containing nitrates, a life-threatening blood disease called a meshemogoldinemia can develop. Boiling oxen does not help - it only increases the content of nitrates in it, therefore it can only damage. Perhaps a man will dig up another well or solve the problem by buying bottled water, corresponding to at least minimal safety standards, for cooking baby food.

Translation Disclaimer: The original language of this article is Russian. For the convenience of users of the iLive portal who do not speak Russian, this article has been translated into the current language, but has not yet been verified by a native speaker who has the necessary qualifications for this. In this regard, we warn you that the translation of this article may be incorrect, may contain lexical, syntactic and grammatical errors.

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